486 - The average IQ needed to understand a P.C.
State-of-the-art - Any computer you can't afford.
Obsolete - Any computer you own.
Microsecond - The time it takes for your State-of-the-art-computer to become obsolete.
Syntax Error - Hi, I want to buy a computer and money is no object.
GUI (pronounced gooey) - What your computer becomes after spilling your coffee on it.
Computer Chip - Any starchy food stuff consumed in mass quantities while programming.
Keyboard - The standard way to generate computer errors.
Mouse - An advanced input device to make computer errors easier to generate.
Floppy - The state of your wallet after purchasing a computer.
Hard Drive - The sales technique employed by computer salesmen.
Portable Computer - A device invented to force businessmen to work at home, on vacation and on business trips.
Disk Crash - A typical computer response to any critical deadline.
Power User - Anyone who can format a disk from DOS.
System Update - A quick method of trashing ALL of your software.