Observations on Computers

Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?

My computer isn't that nervous....it's just a bit ANSI.

If only women came with pull-down menus and online help.

My computer's sick. I think my modem is a carrier.

Your e-mail has been returned due to insufficient voltage.

Multitasking: Screwing up several things at once....

Stack Error: Lost on a cluttered desk....

Stack Overflow: Too many pancakes....

Terminal glare: A look that kills....

Trojan: Storage device for replicating codes....

ASCII to ASCII, DOS to DOS.

How do I set my laser printer on stun?

"Today's subliminal thought is:"

'...now touch these wires to your tongue!'

LSD: virtual reality without the expensive hardware.

According to my calculations the problem doesn't exist.

It said, "Insert disk #3," but only two will fit!

Computers are only human.

Logic: The art of being wrong with confidence....

To iterate is human; to recurse, divine.

Do you like me for my brain or my baud?

If at first you don't succeed, call it version 1.0

Maintenance-free: When it breaks, it can't be fixed...

Memory dump: Amnesia.....

Nostalgia: The good old days multiplied by a bad memory...

WOMEN.ZIP: A great program, but it doesn't come with documentation....

WOMAN.ZIP: Great Shareware, but be careful of viruses...

SET DEVICE=EXXON to screw up your environment.

My BBS is baroque now. Please call Bach later with your Handel.

God is REAL, unless explicitly declared INTEGER.

Asking if computers can think is like asking if submarines can swim.

>From C;\*.* to shining C:\*.*

AAAAAA - American Association Against Acronym Abuse Anonymous

grep...grep...grep... (Frog with UNIX stuck in its' throat)



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