The Index of Leaving Indicators
by Rep. Mel Hancock (R-Missouri; retired)
[sent out to fax machines throughout the Washington
A few days ago, I set down and made a list of 13 indicators that
it is time to leave the United States Congress.
- When the news media slants a story making you look good.
- When you start attending more funerals than weddings.
- When campaign contributors start asking you for money for
their favorite charity.
- When Washington cab drivers seem to be speaking English.
- When airport attendants start offering you a wheelchair.
- When the debate on the House floor starts making sense.
- When handling a bill means something other than paying
- When you cannot remember whether it costs millions or
- When your next-door neighbor back home asks your wife what you
do for a living.
- When you start believing you can balance a budget by spending
6 percent more of your income instead of 10 percent more.
- When the National Rifle Association notifies you it is time to
renew your lifetime membership.
- When you ask your wife for unanimous consent to revise and
extend your remarks and she objects.
- When your grandchildren start calling you Congressman instead
I am going to go home and be grandpa to my nine grandchildren.
Washington Apple Pi IFAQ
December 4, 1998 Lawrence I. Charters