Are you feeling old?

Are you feeling old? If not, consider this:

The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1980.

The Iranian hostage crisis occurred before they were conceived.

They have no memory of a time before MTV.

"New Wave" is their PARENTS musical generation.

Cyndi Lauper, Boy George, the Pretenders, the Kinks, the Sex Pistols -- are all old music they have heard of, if they have heard of it at all.

They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan era.

They were prepubescent when the Persian Gulf War was waged.

If they have heard the name "Oliver North," it was probably as a losing Congressional candidate, or perhaps in some obscure survey history text's reference, such as might be made to Huey Long or Teapot Dome.

Black Monday 1987 is as significant to them as the Great Depression.

Their world has always included AIDS.

Having not lived through the Disco Scare, they can romanticize the 1970s.

They see "Family Ties" as something middle aged ladies watch.

They watched "Star Wars" years ago, when they were kids -- on video.

Atari predates them, as do vinyl albums and cassette audiotapes.

From their earliest years, a camera was something you used once and threw away.

As far as they know, stamps have always cost about 32 cents.

The oil crisis is history of which they probably know nothing -- and why anyone WOULDN'T buy a Suburban is beyond them.

Most of them have probably never seen a real nun, even if they went to Catholic schools.

So, my superannuated friends, why don't we all get together and feel obsolete over some Geritol Tea?

Washington Apple Pi IFAQ
lic Saturday, November 8, 1997