A day without sunshine is like night.
College is a fountain of knowledge...and the students are there to drink.
A polar bear is a rectangular bear after a coordinate transform.
"Some people say that I must be a horrible person, but that's not
true. I have the heart of a young boy -- in a jar on my desk."
-- Steven King, 3/8/90
When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to
resemble a nail.
-- Abraham Maslow
He who dies with the most toys, is, nonetheless, still dead.
The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because
someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the
-- English Professor, Ohio University
What was sliced bread the greatest thing since?
When aiming for the common denominator, be prepared for the occasional division by zero.
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
When you're swimmin' in the creek
And an eel bites your cheek
That's a Moray!
-- Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers
Q: How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools.
Character density: The number of very weird people in the office.
Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
To err is human, to moo bovine.
"... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was
that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful
termination of their C programs."
-- Robert Firth
The meek shall inherit the earth---they are too weak to refuse.
Grabel's Law: 2 is not equal to 3---not even for very large values of 2.
Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a rock.
There are two major products to come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We don't believe this to be a coincidence.