Points to Ponder

- A bus station is where the bus stops.
- A train station is where the train stops.
- My desk is a workstation......

You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax, tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough. - Pearl Williams

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it. - Jackie Gleason

Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. - Red Buttons

Advertising: The science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it. - Stephen Leacock

Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac. - George Carlin

You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is. - Ellen DeGeneres

The reason most people play golf is to wear clothes they would not be caught dead in otherwise. - Roger Simon

It's not hard to tell we was poor-when you saw the toilet paper dryin' on the clothesline. - George Lindsey

Never moon a werewolf. - Mike Binder

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight. -George Gobel

Washington Apple Pi IFAQ
lic Saturday, November 8, 1997